The Heart of Female Same-Sex Attraction

Heart of female same sex attractionOver the past week I have read many posts, blogs, and articles that have discussed the recent Supreme Court ruling legalizing gay marriage. Most of these writings have discussed the political, theological, and sociological reasons for or against gay marriage, and while I am certainly not against these types of articles, I have noticed that there has been a lack of articles that have aided in helping us (particularly Christians) understand the homosexual psyche and struggle. This is my burden for the church.

While there is a place for the church to continue to resist the normalizing of homosexuality and gay marriage in our culture, and especially in our churches, I think it is just as important for the church to prepare itself to reach out with love and real understanding. We must do this for both those in our churches who struggle with same-sex attractions and those not a part of the church who are actively living the homosexual lifestyle. Just to make it clear, I believe homosexuality is not part of God’s divine design and that living a homosexual lifestyle is sinful. However, God has redeemed into His church sinners of ALL kinds and I have great hope that God will draw to himself, redeem, and begin to change many gay and lesbian men and women, and we the church need to be preparing ourselves to be tools that God can use to this end.

With this in mind, for the next several months I will be sharing from a book I have been reading, The Heart of Female Same-Sex Attraction by Janelle Hallman, and to a lesser extent from my personal struggles in this area. My purpose and hope for doing this is to help those who may happen to read my posts develop and deepen their compassion and understanding for women in and outside the church who live with Same-Sex Attraction (SSA) and in a very small way help equip both myself and others to love, understand, and help.

For those who would like to know more about the author Janelle Hallman and her preparation for writing this book, she is a licensed professional counselor who has spent 25 years counseling, befriending or formally interviewing, “hundreds of women with SSA and emotional dependency.” In addition, she has “interviewed over fifty mothers of self-identified lesbian daughters” (Hallman, 2008, p.18). Janelle has mainly worked with women who are “part of a faith tradition” and are “conflicted about or desire to change or manage their same-sex feelings and behaviors in a way that is congruent with their religious beliefs,” (Hallman, 2008, p.19) and are therefore seeking counsel and help. Hallman has also “interviewed many seasoned psychotherapists who specialize in helping women in conflict with SSA and reviewed most of the research and academic literature focusing on etiology, demographics, mental health and clinical consideration of female homosexuality” (Hallman, 2008, p.19). In short, Hallman is well informed and experienced…she knows what she is talking about ☺.

For those of you interested, even if it is just a few, my prayer is that some of what I share will be useful to you and your ministry and will even motivate some to pick this book up for yourselves and study further. As believers, the recent events in our country should concern us, but rather than allowing this concern to lead us to fear, compromise, hatred, or isolation it should motivate us more than ever to equip ourselves to speak the truth in love to those struggling in our churches and to a world confused, lost, and hurting.

Hallman, Janelle. (2008). The heart of female same-sex attraction: A comprehensive counseling resource. Downers Grove, IL: Intervarsity Press.

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